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I never get to do anything I want except face painting and carnivals Kids say the darnedest things! Good thing they sleep for 12 hours a day or the cuteness would overwhelm me and I would have to shoot myself. Here are some tender words my preschooler serenades me with in her melodious little voice. 1- I'm not yours. I'm Daddy's! Answer: Then go ask him to wipe you. 2- Why are you wearing that? Answer: Because I lost my fashion sense when I pushed you out of my uterus. 3- Why did you do that with your face? Answer: Because I am exerting all my willpower not to throw you out of this moving car. 4- The other mothers tell the teachers what they did on the weekend. Why don't you? Answer: Preschool pickup sucks enough without trying to add meaningless small talk to the mix. 5- I am the only one who doesn't go to Disney. Answer: And I am the only mother with a brain. 6- Why can't we have a playdate with Madison? Answer: I hate Madison's mommy because she is too...
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